The Lunxicon

Blech is an interesting “word.” Considered more of an utterance than an actual word to most people, it has a couple of uses, but only one that is particularly widespread. Continue reading Awwwwwww BLECH…

Ayo, so i am very lax on updates these days. Damn this niche topic of mine! Anyway, on February 7, I was delighted and amazed when I got my daily e-mail from the Oxford English Dictionary Online proclaiming “head-banging” the word of the day! Check it: Continue reading I Was Too Busy Headbanging to write…

So over at merriam-webster.com, you can find their Words of 2007. This list was put together based on votes from visitors to the site. Their top word of the year? W00t. No, seriously. Continue reading w00t the fuck is going on?…

Dong is the funniest word in the English language, for my money. I don’t really have any idea why. Probably because it isn’t also my last name.

Continue reading The Dong Song…

Everyone knows some fool who is all huff and puff but with no real bite or even substance. It’s either some dude you hang out with because you’ve known him/her for years, your friend’s annoying significant other, your significant other’s annoying friend, or some other miscellaneous figure on the periphery of your life’s landscape. These types muster up the energy to bluster like a tornado, but all you want is to put on your headphones until they walk away.

Continue reading blustery paragraphs smash your phonograph in half…

A few years ago, I worked as a freelance copy editor for a sports publisher. The fellow in the neighboring cubicle was a rotund fellow named Pete. Pete was a nice guy, to be sure, and he always had some great soundbites. One of my favorites is, “You’re going to Seattle? Pffft…. Should be called Rainattle.” Yes, Pete had a sparkling wit. That, however, is not the point. Pete was enormous–he weighed almost 500 lbs prior to his gastric bypass. I left the company shortly after his surgery and he still weighed an enormous amount. I’ll say it; he’ll admit it: He was huge. A mammoth mountain of a man. I was surprised that paperclips and staples didn’t get sucked into his gravitational pull and start orbiting around him.

Continue reading Pete Was Not As Lugubrious As I First Thought…

Actually, that isn’t totally true. Today kind of sucks. It’s hot as hell outside; it’s even hotter in my apartment. Plus, I took a look at my bank statement and realized that I need to get a job as a nude model or something. However, let’s pretend I wrote this yesterday afternoon, when I was completely gruntled.

Continue reading I’m Totally Gruntled Today…

For the first time in quite a while, I found myself extremely inebriated. I’m not saying this because I am bragging (”Whoah, brah, I drank like 47 beers. And then I went to the bar and did 937 shots!”), because I’m not. I’m just sayin’ is all.

Continue reading I Got Sloshed This Weekend…

You have to love the British. Well, that’s not true. They are particularly easy to dislike–especially for a product of colonial rule such as myself. However, even I will admit that they have a knack for coming up with the best expressions. Take Johnny Foreigner, for example. It is so wonderfully derisive and xenophobic. Not that xenophobia is necessarily wonderful (although derision certainly is), mind you. Continue reading Well, Here Comes Ol’ Johnny Foreigner…

I was talking to my mom a little while ago, mentioning some jobs/internships I had interviewed for, all of which I was extremely excited about. My mom responded with “that’s greete!” Which was her way of saying either, “that’s great” or, “that’s neat.” English isn’t her first language, so sometimes she flubs a little. Continue reading What A Greete Idea!…